Yesterday was my last pump and I'm not sure what to think. It's still sitting on the couch.
Next child I'm gonna do my best to nurse.
Sorry boys, mommy needed to keep from going insane.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
When I was 26
So if you didn't already think I was a little wacky you will now...
Ever since I was little the age 26 always stuck out to me. I thought something would happen to me, I thought I was going to die. Little did I know something WAS going to happen to me. My life would change at the age of 26. I became pregnant at 26, gave birth at 26 (not to one baby, but two), and got engaged at 26. If you ask me, those are pretty big items off a woman's "to-do lists" in life. (Not all women of course). My cup went from pretty full to overflowing.
Deciding that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone and making that commitment is pretty huge. It wasn't a hard decision for me though, the way Mark makes me feel about myself and the kind of partner he is, the support he shows me and unconditional love he has for me...the list goes on. We both have our flaws, but when you put us together, we're a pretty strong team.
Finding out we were pregnant...it was not planned of course. I knew I was getting a ring from Mark within weeks and was excited to start planning a wedding so the morning the pregnancy test showed up positive I cried. I stood in the corner of the bathroom with my head in the corner like I was in a timeout or something and cried. I felt like I had let Mark down, like I failed him. It wasn't what we wanted just yet. But when I walked back into the room crying he knew, and he said this is a good thing and that he was happy. I laid on him crying while he was shaking me smiling and happy and telling me how happy he was and how much he loved me. (Now do you see the support thing I'm talking about?) Now looking back at it I'm sure he was shaking in his boots himself...but he didn't let me see it. He knew he needed to be strong for me, and he was...he is everyday...awwww, I know...
Finding out we were having twins...our first appointment at 8 weeks. During the ultrasound, Mark had JUST finished saying in a joking voice, "Make sure there's only one in there." The OB, then said, "There's one, annnddddd there's the other." We looked at each other and laughed (the nervous holy shit laugh). Being pregnant the majority of the year was hard and tiring, but fun. I look back now and really think I enjoyed being pregnant.
So when I was 26...I decided to marry the most awesomest man and met my first two children. Yeah, I'd say that's a good year.
Age 27, you have a lot to live up to.
Ever since I was little the age 26 always stuck out to me. I thought something would happen to me, I thought I was going to die. Little did I know something WAS going to happen to me. My life would change at the age of 26. I became pregnant at 26, gave birth at 26 (not to one baby, but two), and got engaged at 26. If you ask me, those are pretty big items off a woman's "to-do lists" in life. (Not all women of course). My cup went from pretty full to overflowing.
Deciding that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone and making that commitment is pretty huge. It wasn't a hard decision for me though, the way Mark makes me feel about myself and the kind of partner he is, the support he shows me and unconditional love he has for me...the list goes on. We both have our flaws, but when you put us together, we're a pretty strong team.
Finding out we were pregnant...it was not planned of course. I knew I was getting a ring from Mark within weeks and was excited to start planning a wedding so the morning the pregnancy test showed up positive I cried. I stood in the corner of the bathroom with my head in the corner like I was in a timeout or something and cried. I felt like I had let Mark down, like I failed him. It wasn't what we wanted just yet. But when I walked back into the room crying he knew, and he said this is a good thing and that he was happy. I laid on him crying while he was shaking me smiling and happy and telling me how happy he was and how much he loved me. (Now do you see the support thing I'm talking about?) Now looking back at it I'm sure he was shaking in his boots himself...but he didn't let me see it. He knew he needed to be strong for me, and he was...he is everyday...awwww, I know...
Finding out we were having twins...our first appointment at 8 weeks. During the ultrasound, Mark had JUST finished saying in a joking voice, "Make sure there's only one in there." The OB, then said, "There's one, annnddddd there's the other." We looked at each other and laughed (the nervous holy shit laugh). Being pregnant the majority of the year was hard and tiring, but fun. I look back now and really think I enjoyed being pregnant.
So when I was 26...I decided to marry the most awesomest man and met my first two children. Yeah, I'd say that's a good year.
Age 27, you have a lot to live up to.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Maybe for my birthday...
the boys will decide to sleep 8 straight hours....
Doubtful, but a girl could wish. Every night I go to sleep thinking, what if tonight's the night? What if they go backwards and wake up in two hours like they did ALL damn day? Oh please don't do that.
Time to slide past the bassinet and crawl next to the co-sleeper and lay down next to my snoring soon-to-be husband and wait to see what the night has in store...
I'll be 27 tomorrow, tomorrow I'll tell you about being 26...
Doubtful, but a girl could wish. Every night I go to sleep thinking, what if tonight's the night? What if they go backwards and wake up in two hours like they did ALL damn day? Oh please don't do that.
Time to slide past the bassinet and crawl next to the co-sleeper and lay down next to my snoring soon-to-be husband and wait to see what the night has in store...
I'll be 27 tomorrow, tomorrow I'll tell you about being 26...
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
The Twinning Process
Many people ask me whether or not the boys are identical. The answer is, we don't know. When I tell people we don't know they look at me like I'm stupid for not knowing. Let me show you how the twinning process works.
Most of us know there are fraternal twins and identical twins. We know fraternal twins are the result of two eggs and two sperm. (Babies share 50% DNA). 99.99999% of the time boy/girl twins are fraternal. So don't ask someone with boy/girl twins if they're identical. Fraternal twins are ALWAYS dichorionic/diamniotic. This means they each have their own amniotic sacs and each have their own chorionic sacs, along with their own placentas. (However, placentas can fuse during pregnancy.)
And we also know that identical twins results from one egg splitting. When it splits determines a lot.
-If the egg splits after 13 days of fertilization it will result in monochorionic/monoamniotic. Sharing one sac and conjoined twins may result.
-If the eggs splits between 8 and 13 days after fertilization it will result in monochorionic/monoamniotic. Sharing one sac and will run the risk of the cord tangling.
-If the egg splits between 3 and 8 days after fertilization it will result in monochorionic/diamniotic. Rach having their own amniotic sacs but sharing one chorion and sharing one placenta.
-If the egg splits 3-4 days after fertilization it will result in dichorionic/diamniotic. Each in their own sacs and have their own placenta (however, the placenta can fuse)
You see the last possibility is the same as fraternal twins. If you have dichorionic/diamniotic twins the doctors do not know whether it resulted from two eggs or one egg splitting, therefore the only way to be 100% sure that they are fraternal or identical is to do a DNA test. (Unless they are boy/girl twins, then you know they are fraternal)
I was told early on in my pregnancy that the boys were di/di twins...My placenta did come out as one. (I'm assuming it fused) The only way to know if they are identical is a DNA test. Now if they would have recorded their blood type which they didn't it could help. If they do not have the same blood type, they are not identical, however they can still have the same blood type and be fraternal, that is why the DNA test is needed.
Hope this all makes sense.
Most of us know there are fraternal twins and identical twins. We know fraternal twins are the result of two eggs and two sperm. (Babies share 50% DNA). 99.99999% of the time boy/girl twins are fraternal. So don't ask someone with boy/girl twins if they're identical. Fraternal twins are ALWAYS dichorionic/diamniotic. This means they each have their own amniotic sacs and each have their own chorionic sacs, along with their own placentas. (However, placentas can fuse during pregnancy.)
And we also know that identical twins results from one egg splitting. When it splits determines a lot.
-If the egg splits after 13 days of fertilization it will result in monochorionic/monoamniotic. Sharing one sac and conjoined twins may result.
-If the eggs splits between 8 and 13 days after fertilization it will result in monochorionic/monoamniotic. Sharing one sac and will run the risk of the cord tangling.
-If the egg splits between 3 and 8 days after fertilization it will result in monochorionic/diamniotic. Rach having their own amniotic sacs but sharing one chorion and sharing one placenta.
-If the egg splits 3-4 days after fertilization it will result in dichorionic/diamniotic. Each in their own sacs and have their own placenta (however, the placenta can fuse)
You see the last possibility is the same as fraternal twins. If you have dichorionic/diamniotic twins the doctors do not know whether it resulted from two eggs or one egg splitting, therefore the only way to be 100% sure that they are fraternal or identical is to do a DNA test. (Unless they are boy/girl twins, then you know they are fraternal)
I was told early on in my pregnancy that the boys were di/di twins...My placenta did come out as one. (I'm assuming it fused) The only way to know if they are identical is a DNA test. Now if they would have recorded their blood type which they didn't it could help. If they do not have the same blood type, they are not identical, however they can still have the same blood type and be fraternal, that is why the DNA test is needed.
Hope this all makes sense.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Another Day of Bottles & Diapers
This was the calmest part of the day. I love his little booty. (The other one found comfort in the swing). I'm pooped.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Last Year's Valetines Day and This Years...
Last year Mark took me on an overnight stay at Terranea. An oceanfront resort in Palos Verdes. it was absolutely beautiful and most definitely a romantic night. We got to our room to see truffles and a bottle of champagne. We then went to dinner and drinks and came back to the room to a drawn bath with rose pedals leading up to the tub and in it. It was BY FAR, the most romantic and nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Some girls claim that they don't need to be wined and dined to feel good and I think I fall under that category, but I could sure get used to that. It was exciting, sweet, and did I mention romantic?
This year... hhuuuummm, how two babies really mix things up.... I didn't even think about Valentine's Day. No thought went into today, nor did I want anything out of it. Mark came home with a single rose and a sweet card from him and the boys and we ate chocolate chip pancakes for dinner. Besides being sleep deprived, it's all I need. My family here with me. Mark and I have been so overwhelmed with babies and him with work and trying to do EVERYTHING I ask of him (or demand, whichever way you wish to look at it) that stopping to pick up a rose let's me know he will never forget about me. I got Mark nothing. I somewhat feel like a schmuck although he will say he doesn't need anything and he loves that I'm the mother of his boys. (By far the greatest compliment in the world.)
A perfect example of how life can change very quickly. I wouldn't change a thing and I know one day in the future Mark and I will take many more romantic trips...for now, we're enjoying us a family. I love them. I love Mark as a future husband, a dad, and a man. He is, my valentine.
- Sunrise view from our room
A perfect example of how life can change very quickly. I wouldn't change a thing and I know one day in the future Mark and I will take many more romantic trips...for now, we're enjoying us a family. I love them. I love Mark as a future husband, a dad, and a man. He is, my valentine.
- <3
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Mom's Bday Dessert Oops
Mom and Dad came over for her bday with Outback takeout and we baked her a cake... or tried...
This was supposed to be a vanilla and choc cake with raspberry filling and choc frosting
Mark tried...
The rest of the night was nice, cribbage and babies...
Happy birthday Grammy
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Two Months!
- We're Growing!
Cooper - HOLY MOLY high maintenance Cooper! He's gassy and fussy. I'm in the process of attempting to transition to formula because the boobie sucking machine is taking up way too much time and it's hard to manage the boys while being attached to it. Well Cooper hates all formula and he lets me know. It's a chore to get him to take formula bottles and I usually pay for it later while he is screaming with a tummy ache. He loves to be cuddled and will let anyone have the honor. So far I've noticed that he loves to sleep on his tummy and if it wasn't so taboo I would let him. He sleeps so much better and I do think he has the head strength to do it. He also puts weight on his legs, we can stand him up and he bounces a little. Pretty good for his age. We're still working on the weight gain, I tend to stress about it so I had Mark go buy me a baby scale. According to that scale, he's just under 8 lbs. He really enjoys the swing and of course hates being naked and getting his diaper changed.
Cannon- My mother nicknamed him M&M for Mini Mark. Many people are starting to say he looks like Mark. I don't really see anyone in either of them but okay. Cannon is like a garbage disposal, he's a GREAT eater! Taking 100 mls every 2-3 hours. I am also guilty of giving him anything Cooper didn't finish. (I hate wasting my milk) So if Cannon has weight issues in the future, yup that's my fault. Cannon is (most days) my low maintenance child. He will sit in the swing, the bouncy, the boppy. He's a pretty chill kid. He also ROLLED OVER last week. From belly to back...NOT fond of tummy time.
Both boys are puckering their lips like they're about to coo any day and I'm waiting excitedly. They make little smiles here and there and I'm still not sure if its gas or real. They're BEYOND gassy, but they're such beautiful babies (of course I would say that, they're mine). They both have colds as I finish typing this post (cause it's taken me two days, like most posts do.) I'm actually waiting to hear from the doctors to see if it's RSV which would mean a hospital visit. I hate seeing them sick, it's no fun at all.
It's scary how fast this is going. Do I want it to slow down right now? I'm not gonna lie, NOPE. This is tough, very tough. I was just telling my sister the other day that if I had a fast forward button I would be very tempted to push it. I am constantly reminding myself that I'll never get these days back and one day I'll look back and wish I could rewind time but SHIT, I don't know that I care right now. However I will say that I'm adapting. Things may not be getting easier, but it's easier to deal. I'm learning the boys cries and I'm better at assessing their needs, so I guess that makes the process of baby care a little less stressful. I'm also beginning to realize that this is for keeps, they're not going back inside my belly, this is for keeps. For KEEPS, FOREVER! The lack of sleep still sucks. I'll never get those nights back. Mark and I are still adjusting in our new added roles to our lives, while attempting to make time for one another. (Probably the hardest part of it all.) I want to set a good example for these boys and in order to do that, mom and dad must be on the same page, reading at the same pace. We're working on it.
I still can't believe I'm a mother. What's even more crazy, I already know this soon that I want to do this again....I see more kids in our future. :)
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
We are thankful for...
The boys would like to take a moment to share their appreciation for all the help and visitors they've had. They feel very blessed.
First and foremost:
Our dad. He is the most amazing dad in the entire world. Our dad gets up every morning and goes to work for his family. We know that we are his number one and we know he loves our crazy mom too. He checks on us throughout the day and sometimes even comes home early when we're too much for mom to handle. When he gets home he takes no time for himself and gets right into taking care of us. He even gets up with us at night. We can see in his face how much he loves us. We really see how selfless he is and appreciate all of his hard work. We can't wait to get advice from him as we grow and learn. We love you daddy.
Grammy and Papa James:
She came and stayed with us for a few days. She didn't stop the whole time she was here. Always taking care of us or cleaning or organizing or cooking. It let mom relax and feel like she was able to enjoy us and not have to worry about all that day-to-day not fun stuff. She still comes over often and just starts doing laundry or cleaning and we can tell mom loves the help. (Even though she wouldn't mind if she just sat and held one of us either.) She also let us stay at her house so she could help mom out with the night feedings and let her sleep. Mom LOVED it. We love our Grammy James. We love Papa too. One time, Papa was keeping an eye on us while mom and dad were trying to get ready for a brunch and we both decided to get real fussy and cry at the same time and Papa didn't know what to do so he laughed. :)
Grandma Tonette and Papa Frank:
Wow, Grandma Tonette is the food lady! She has brought mom and dad soooo many dinners they can just put in the freezer and thaw out. She stops by on her way home from work sometimes and hangs out with mom and holds us. She makes those late afternoons that drag go by a lot faster and keeps mom from calling dad and bugging him about what time he'll be home. Papa Frank has also stopped by to come hang out with us. We love them like crazy. We enjoying hanging at their place on the weekends with all of our family.
Erin & Patti:
Our second cousins are nurses! Erin is a L&D nurse and Patti is a NICU nurse. Mom loves this. They have come over many times and mom feels at ease knowing we are in good hands. Thank you cousins!
More Family Visitors:
Auntie Devon is now coming over on Mondays to hang with us. It frees mommy up to work or take care of any errands or housework that needs to be done. (She usually brings us over a yummy dinner too!) She loves to cuddle us.
MORE Visitors and helpers:
Alexis comes on Thursdays so mom can go into work. She is TOO MUCH.... ;)
Keri is mom's best friend. She stayed the whole time mom was in labor with us and rubbed her back when we were giving her pain. She comes down to see us whenever she can. Last time she even brought mom some food, the cake was amazing! She visited us in the NICU too. Mom has known her since high school and wishes she lived closer to us. Keri's mom Diane also came to visit and brought three dinners over!! She's sorry she forgot to take a picture.
(We do not like her sweatshirt though...shhh don't tell)
Kimberly has offered mom to come over to help out too. Mom thinks she is the baby whisperer. Must be those years of nanny experience. She's gonna be an awesome mom one day.
As you can see we are loved by many! For the sake of not letting this post get crazy long, mom will not post more pictures. Many people have gone above and beyond to help out our family and show us the love. We are truly blessed and grateful for all the people in our life.
Thank you everyone for your love and support!
Cannon and Cooper
First and foremost:
Our dad. He is the most amazing dad in the entire world. Our dad gets up every morning and goes to work for his family. We know that we are his number one and we know he loves our crazy mom too. He checks on us throughout the day and sometimes even comes home early when we're too much for mom to handle. When he gets home he takes no time for himself and gets right into taking care of us. He even gets up with us at night. We can see in his face how much he loves us. We really see how selfless he is and appreciate all of his hard work. We can't wait to get advice from him as we grow and learn. We love you daddy.
- Dad feeding Cannon in the NICU
She came and stayed with us for a few days. She didn't stop the whole time she was here. Always taking care of us or cleaning or organizing or cooking. It let mom relax and feel like she was able to enjoy us and not have to worry about all that day-to-day not fun stuff. She still comes over often and just starts doing laundry or cleaning and we can tell mom loves the help. (Even though she wouldn't mind if she just sat and held one of us either.) She also let us stay at her house so she could help mom out with the night feedings and let her sleep. Mom LOVED it. We love our Grammy James. We love Papa too. One time, Papa was keeping an eye on us while mom and dad were trying to get ready for a brunch and we both decided to get real fussy and cry at the same time and Papa didn't know what to do so he laughed. :)
- Grammy and Papa - visiting us at home
Wow, Grandma Tonette is the food lady! She has brought mom and dad soooo many dinners they can just put in the freezer and thaw out. She stops by on her way home from work sometimes and hangs out with mom and holds us. She makes those late afternoons that drag go by a lot faster and keeps mom from calling dad and bugging him about what time he'll be home. Papa Frank has also stopped by to come hang out with us. We love them like crazy. We enjoying hanging at their place on the weekends with all of our family.
- Papa Frank
- Grandma Tonette
Our second cousins are nurses! Erin is a L&D nurse and Patti is a NICU nurse. Mom loves this. They have come over many times and mom feels at ease knowing we are in good hands. Thank you cousins!
- Cousins!
Auntie Devon is now coming over on Mondays to hang with us. It frees mommy up to work or take care of any errands or housework that needs to be done. (She usually brings us over a yummy dinner too!) She loves to cuddle us.
- Auntie Devon
- uncle Drake & Shannon
- Auntie Darcy & Uncle Lincoln
- Auntie Candace
- Auntie Jess and Great Grandma GG
- The Gurrs - they brought us dinner!!!
MORE Visitors and helpers:
Alexis comes on Thursdays so mom can go into work. She is TOO MUCH.... ;)
- Alexis
- KERI!!
- Kellie- she brought us dinner too!
Kimberly has offered mom to come over to help out too. Mom thinks she is the baby whisperer. Must be those years of nanny experience. She's gonna be an awesome mom one day.
- Kimberly
- Andilene
- JuJu
- Wendy and Christine
- Jenny and Sue
- Minh!
Thank you everyone for your love and support!
Cannon and Cooper
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
